Navigating the Unknown
I have been through floods and fires and earthquakes and riots. Today in Los Angeles, we are all affected by the shooting and then these heart-breaking fires.
From a young age, life landed me with unexpected situations. I think that seeded a passion for me to learn how to deal with the unexpected and navigate the challenge.
Here are a few things I do when hurt and uncertain about what now?
1. Delete the need to know why this is happening. It is normal to want answers and the brain craves it. Catch yourself and stop when you can.
2. Do only what you have to do each day and evening. Say no so you can make space for your shock and grieving.
3. Pause often and look at something that is beautiful to you. Beauty heals. I keep a 4×6 photo of the word “LOVE” with me and for years, that takes me away from my spinning head that longs for a decision or away from suffering, even if for just a moment.
4. When possible, I get creative. Cooking, writing, doodling, music, gardening, rearranging furniture, dancing, yoga pose, seeding herbs or making vinegars, you get the idea—something that lifts me and gets me into that moment of creativity.
5. Sending emails to people with a thought of the day, a quotation. At times, I can only muster up that energy for five minutes and still it feels good.
6. Remind myself this won’t last forever and I am not being punished. Often people share with me, “What did I do wrong that this happened?” Life, as you know, is a mystery.
7. Top on my daily practice is to acknowledge what I appreciate and to be extra compassionate with myself. I am doing the best I can. It is normal to collapse and rise, over and over, until a new rhythm lands.
8. Surprisingly, what worked one day may not work the next. This is normal.
9. Check in with myself throughout the day asking, “How are you doing? What are you thinking about and do you need to be thinking about that now? What do you need today to support you?”
10. Are your thoughts realistic or fantasy thoughts? Our expectations of others and ourselves often are unreal and we get disappointed.
You will find your way through the sorrow and fear. Share what you are going through, even if on the phone, and choose a friend you trust. People want to help you.
Take good care and be gentle with yourself.
My wife and I have been living in this great community of Pacific Palisades for over 40 years. A lot of things happened in this period, including an ever-increasing utilization of solar panels.
Now we did install thermal solar panels more than 40 years ago. We did install photovoltaic solar panels just three years ago and we are very happy with this system.
We have, in fact, gotten an electric vehicle. Including the charging of the electric vehicle, in the summer months, our electric bill is zero, including the $24 bimonthly charge from the LADWP.
I do feel that everyone should follow the example of the Caruso development in that they also have installed photovoltaic solar panels to generate electricity for their shopping center that is now located in our community.
I think all of us should do the same.
I think a move to the Business District of Antioch is a fine compromise to the Pacific Palisades Farmers Market’s return to the Village. Its original location was so unfair to homeowners on Monument with trucks arriving at 6 a.m. every Sunday. Let’s not make that same mistake.
When we look at Antioch, consider the street from Via De La Paz, past the Village Green, to Sunset. Then Swarthmore, from Sunset, past the Village Green toward the bluffs, but only through the commercial area. Trucks could park along that stretch before The Village School. No neighborhood disturbance.
This decision will affect our community for a long time. Hope it is well considered. Good luck with it.