Thanksgiving Thoughts

Thanksgiving is a wonderful opportunity to gather and celebrate, but, as any sitcom fan knows, it can also be tricky and stressful. So, how might we best find happiness on this very special day? The Palisadian-Post reached out to some of the town’s spiritual leaders for the answers. And they may surprise you.

I respectfully disagree with the idea that the goal on Thanksgiving is to be happy. What we commemorate on this day is that the fall harvest was successful, thanks to the wisdom and sharing of native peoples, and our ancestors wouldn’t starve that winter. The focus is not on ourselves and our happiness but on the abundance we are blessed to enjoy and the spiritually proper response of gratitude for that abundance.

We live in a culture that is always telling us that we don’t have enough—we need to buy more. We are constantly encouraged to feel like we lack, that we need another or the newest, best, shiniest and most expensive version of whatever it is we’re being sold. This keeps us in a state of cultivated dissatisfaction.

Thanksgiving is about the exact opposite; it’s about taking a day to acknowledge how much we have and to feel a very real satisfaction with that. Whenever we feel truly grateful our natural desire is to give so that others are able to experience this sense of satiety and well-being.

So when we are truly grateful, we create a better reality for others. This is the real goal of the holiday—not to be happy but to be aware of and profoundly grateful for all that we have so that our lives take on deeper meaning.

Our children need to see this modeled now more than ever before. Science tells us that the brain cannot hold both gratitude and fear at the same time. Our practice of gratitude on Thanksgiving, then, is also the best way to address the fear and cynicism of our time.

We may or may not be happy on Thanksgiving, but in practicing true gratitude we will certainly feel blessed.

Rabbi Amy Bernstein | Kehillat Israel

When I was growing up in Ireland, we had no special day that was devoted just to giving thanks. Having lived in America now for over 50 years, I have become very aware of the gift that Thanksgiving Day can be.

The older we get, the more conscious we become of the need for saying “thank you.” As young children, our parents reminded us to say thank you to those who gifted us. As we walk our life’s journey, we become more conscious of how grateful we are for every new day, for good health, great relationships and for a good night’s sleep!

The Native American people were very comfortable with recognizing that all good things come from the Creator and everything we have and are is somehow linked to the One who gave them to us. Rituals of thanksgiving and gratitude abounded in their culture. Our forefathers had some of that internal blessing of recognizing that we are nothing without the gifts of a wonderful, generous God.

So how do we give thanks?

Here in the United States, we traditionally gather around the table with family and friends, we share good food and wine, we tell stories, and we remember how blessed and gifted we are.

So, my friends, enjoy this wonderful day for giving thanks and, maybe, each one of us can be conscious of one thing in our lives for which we are truly grateful.

Father Liam Kidney | Corpus Christi Parish

As we approach Thanksgiving, it is a natural time to pause and think about the many things in our lives for which we ought to be or are thankful. For two or three years when I was very young, before my family dug into our Thanksgiving dinner, we went around the table and each of us named things for which we were thankful. It was fun for a while but eventually one or more of us would get impatient with how much time it was taking or we couldn’t think of anything else to name.

There is a tendency to think that happiness can only be found externally through such things as a nice car or house or a good job or a lot of people who seem to like us. But in truth happiness is more internally determined and experienced. Someone can be dealing with cancer and get news of it going into remission and be very thankful even though they have been and may continue to be dealing with a lot of pain and stress.

How to be happy on Thanksgiving? Well I recommend setting aside some quiet time early on Thanksgiving Day to take stock of aspects of your life that make you rich. I plan to do that this year because I have experienced many Thanksgivings in which we have been so busy preparing, serving and cleaning up a large meal that I’m totally exhausted and glad to see the day come to an end when it does. Think of your many friends, family members (even if not everyone) and realities that are truthfully very wonderful for you.

Yet in the final analysis, as I indicated earlier, it’s not how many friends you have or a long list of goods that will make your day happy. It’s simply recognizing the blessings that are yours, even if that is only one or two primary things at the present time.

Pastor Dr. Wayne B. Walters | Community United Methodist Church

In the 1971 film version of the famous Broadway musical, “Fiddler on the Roof,” a humorous scene plays out as follows:

Townsperson: “Rabbi, may I ask you a question. Is there a proper blessing for the Tsar?”

Rabbi: “A blessing for the Tsar? Of course! May God bless and keep the Tsar … far away from us!”

It’s a popular and classic cultural joke but buried beneath it is an important theme: finding the blessing in everything.

Life is full of tragedies and hardships. Thanks to major technological breakthroughs and the growth and popularity of online social media and news networks, we are exposed to hundreds of tragedies close to home and far away. Human beings shoulder so much bad news.

The blessing—the moment of gratitude—is thus more important than ever. When you go around the Thanksgiving table and share with your family and friends what you are grateful for, remember to mention the teensy-teeny, little things in life. Make it your habit to be grateful every single day for the myriad of blessings you enjoy in your life. Studies show that a thankful and positive attitude make us happier and more resilient. Life—every moment of it—is the biggest blessing you can imagine!

We have a habit of not appreciating something until it’s gone. Hence, being grateful for the things we have is not always easy and natural. Here is an exercise you can do to develop this sense of gratitude and appreciation:

• Think about something or someone you really love.
• Concentrate deeply on it from every angle.
• Now imagine it wasn’t there.
• Now describe your feelings to yourself.
• Remind yourself that you have it and feel the relief and pleasure—that feeling is gratitude.
• Share what you are grateful for with your friends and family this Thanksgiving, and every day after.

Rabbi Zushe Cunin | Chabad of Pacific Palisades

The events of daily life build a burden of worry on our hearts and minds. If we stop to refresh ourselves now and then, the burden becomes lighter.

Several times each day I pause for a refresh, by doing some gentle deep breathing, and then to feel peace and quiet within my being.

I find that worries and anxieties slip away, replaced naturally by a sense of calm wellness of being.

Out of this state can arise desirable positive emotions of love, gratitude and peace of mind.

A daily diary that I read, of words from Paramahansa Yogananda says, “Thanksgiving and praise open in your consciousness the way for spiritual growth and supply to come to you.

“Spirit pushes itself out into visible manifestation as soon as a channel is opened through which it can flow.”

I have found that a brief refresh, opens a channel for positive thoughts and feelings, which can then flow into words and actions.

Brother Minister Satyananda | Self-Realization Fellowship – Lake Shrine

It is the quintessential question that has plagued humanity—“What is the meaning of life, and how can I be happy?” George Burns once said, “Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close knit family—in another city.”

Everyone wants to be happy; the pursuit of happiness is instilled in all of us. We are always looking for it and we want so desperately to be happy.

Studies have shown that the holidays are not the happiest time of the year, but rather can be the loneliest and saddest for many people. We tend to look inward during the holidays, and as we take those moments of reflection, sometimes we tend to focus on what is missing or what has gone wrong, and why our lives do not look like a Norman Rockwell painting.

We forget what we have; We forget our bounty and our blessings.

So how do we refocus our sights on what is truly important? How do we stop the myopia in our hearts?

We must remember that there is a difference between happiness and joy. True joy is not governed by our externalities. Sometimes the conditions of our lives may seem to prevent us from being “happy,” but it is then that we need to think on how deep our well is. We all hope for personal transformation each day, and as we pursue this, we must see that God is on our side, and we must live in gratitude each day.

A world free of pain and suffering does not exist. But with our grateful hearts, we can see beyond present pain and suffering, and look at our lives with hope in knowing that when we nurture a grateful heart, it is then that we can have a glimpse of true joy.

Associate Pastor Grace Park | Palisades Presbyterian Church